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Tusk (2014)
[rating=2]
rolex aaa replica rolex day date rolex calibre 2836 mens 228396 silver tone placed control in the furniture altar.e zigarette ohne nikotin for sale in the pursuit of the ultimate elegance at the same time the perfect fusion of ingenuity unique bold design.What do you say about a movie recommended to you that includes an old man in an empty house who is filled with all kinds of bizarre life stories? One of which is when he was younger and stuck on an island with only a walrus he named “Mr. Tusk”. Well, switch over to a couple of podcasters who’s schtick is to be assholes to internet-famous people one meets all over the country. This guy is Justin Long’s character who played Mac in Mac vs. PC commercials and his name is Wallace. His mustache is that of a douchebag worthy of douchebaggery and his buddy in podcasting is his buddy, Sixth Sense’s own dead-people seeing Haley Joel Osment as Teddy. Teddy and Wallace have a plan to make fun of internet sensation, The Kill Bill Kid (a take on The Star Wars Kid). So, Wallace makes a plan to visit him in Canada only to be disappointed in what he finds there. So, while taking a piss in a bathroom in full defeat mode, he finds a page on the wall of a man filled with all kinds of tall tales and adventure. Intrigued, Mac drives up to Bifrost, Canada to visit said man.
He meets up with an old dude who is bizarre and strange in his huge old home…in the middle of nowhere. Old dude talks of his meeting with Hemingway and also his friend, Mr. Tusk. All of this time, Wallace is a douche and drinks the old man’s tea. Most everyone else would have said “Nahh, I’m good” and hauled ass to somewhere safe. Not Wallace… He drinks the tea and wakes up the next day drowsy and, oh yes…without his left leg. The old man talks about having to take drastic measures to save his life from a brown recluse spider bite and called a doctor out to revive Wallace and keep him there. Of course, there’s no doctor…or phone…and Wallace’s phone mysteriously disappeared.
Reaching out to his girlfriend and buddy, Teddy were fruitless after he found his phone. Sure, they were together but too busy to help Wallace out. By the time they did, it was too late. The old man had plans of his own to reunite with his friend, Mr. Tusk and took every measure to do so. Every…measure…!! So, not to go into everything, expect crazy mishaps and a wild appearance by Johnny Depp who must’ve been bribed to take part in this Kevin Smith weirdo flick. Now, I like weird flicks but this shit was some other shit!
There were a few laughs and some Canadian jabs like “aboot” (instead of “about”) and hockey jokes. But once the movie ended, it made no sense to me. I would’ve asked for a nice, 50 cent bullet to the brain but..oh well. Check it out if you’d like in case you want some drawn out scenes and a weird storyline that leaves you with a face that best resembles an emoji. It won’t be on repeat.